…[O]nce you become the target of a Vindictive Narcissist, she will try to destroy you. You may have challenged her superior status in some way you don’t even recognize, and as a result, she needs to prove you the ultimate loser by destroying you. She’ll talk trash about you to friends and family. (CHECK) She might try to get you fired. (CHECK) If she is your ex-wife, she might try to turn your children against you and spend years tying you up in family court. (CHECK).
From: https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/shame/201509/5-types-extreme-narcissists-and-how-deal-them (CHECKs are this author’s)
- Sam and Melanie, Zack’s dad and stepmom, met with a counselor at Zack’s new school to share information and concern about Zack and this summer’s contact denial as well as the long-term impacts of alienation. The counselor was guardedly supportive and said she would talk to Zack and invite him to join a group of students who meet because of family issues. When Melanie asked if Missy could object to Zack’s involvement and ultimately forbid it, the counselor said that Missy does have the final say (see “Mommy’s in charge,” in Story #2). The counselor went on to say that if his mother recognizes that Zack is negatively impacted by the custody drama, surely she would agree to Zack getting some support. Based on nearly all of Missy’s past predictable behavior, she will not only object, but she will quickly find a way to make Sam pay (wielding Zack) for talking with the counselor which she will see as a violation of her authority. Stay tuned.
- Today was the “pre-trial” in county court (the same backward county court system that gave Missy full custody ten years ago). Again, stay tuned.
- Now that the school year has begun, the regular weekly parenting schedule should resume. Sam called Zack and Zack actually answered and spoke to him. Zack not only sounded willing to ride the bus to his Dad’s on their established day, but Zack told Sam that he had been talking to a neighbor friend (a neighbor when Zack is at his Dad’s) about playing together. The call ended with Zack saying he “might come,” and he would let Sam know ASAP. Almost immediately after they hung up, Sam received a text from Zack saying he would not be riding the bus home to his Dad’s on Wednesday (today). A conclusion could be drawn that either Missy intervened or Zack is unwilling to be dismissive voice-to-voice, but can reject Sam comfortably via text.